Parenting
My Biggest Regret
Being a parent is vulnerable. For the most part, I feel good about how I’ve done so far as a parent. Sure, I’ve made mistakes and had many moments I’m not proud of. But overall, I think I have done more good than harm with my children. And yet… I have a big capital R…
Read MoreThe Last Bite of Ice Cream
Watching your child grow up is like opening a perfectly selected gift and eating the last bite of ice cream. It’s a delightful privilege and a blessing. And it’s wrought with grief. Seven. So much bigger than six. Six is first grade. Just out of kindergarten, still little enough to run up and hug and…
Read MoreHow Many Wishes Do I Get?
To say it’s been a minute would be quite the understatement. In fact, it’s been 3,676,238 minutes since I last published a blog post. When I last published a blog post, I wasn’t even yet aware I was newly pregnant with my second child. When I last wrote here, my soulmate dog Scout, my grandma,…
Read MoreThe Greatest Paradox
I never imagined myself getting divorced. I thought I would really have that whole ‘happily ever after’ thing. 4 years ago, the reality of the possibility of divorce started creeping up on me. And 3 years ago, I filed. I didn’t have any money in savings. I used a credit card that my ex wasn’t…
Read MoreWith Great Joy Comes Great Sorrow
Last year, I read this open letter to a stepmom and wrestled with all of my feelings about it. First, I wanted to throat-punch the author. Then, I wanted a relationship like that with “my” stepmom. Finally, the despair of deep acceptance that I’ll never have that kind of relationship with my son’s stepmom. The…
Read MoreA Lot
Today was a day of a lot. A lot of work. A lot of play. A lot of laughter. A lot of joy. I don’t delude myself that every day can be so full. Or can it? Maybe when I stay open to all of life, it can be. Because only when you are open…
Read MoreA Favorite of Mine
I dread the moment I realize I have read this to my son for the last time. We started reading this one before he was 2 years old. And when he was about 2 1/2, he went through a phase of insisting on reading it TO ME. Now at bedtime, he tells me to close…
Read MoreIt Goes By So Fast
Tonight, my kiddo was disappointed that I did not lie down next to him. I had intended to do the dishes and come right back. The dishes didn’t take long; there weren’t many. But when I was done, I noticed he was quiet. “Are you asleep already?” No response. I went over to his…
Read MoreYou’re Only As Ordinary As You Feel
Two years ago today, I highlighted this on my kindle: As this cycle continues you feel stupid, defeated, and begin to believe that maybe you really are the central problem. Often the spouse begins to be deeply torn between wanting to know what else he/she could do to help the marriage and feeling cynical /…
Read MoreSugar Habit
I’ve got a mean sweet tooth. Friends and family who read this are thinking to themselves, “no! really?” I know, I know. God bless my mother’s heart for trying to prevent me from eating entire packets of sugar. Like, the ones on the table at Denny’s. Yes, I was that kid. And it took a…
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